Lies 018

My life is one big awkward moment, followed by death.

Yes, every moment of every day is somehow, even if just slightly, awkward.

Take mousy hair girl, what do you do from here?

Smile? Eat breakfast? Pretend like nothing ever happened? Get married?

I start off with the smile and suggest we eat breakfast out, maybe at some Diner in town. Yes, always a good move.

Eat lots of food and contemplate my options.

While eating the sausages I think, "Hey, marriage! Not bad. Could be worse."

And then I move on to the eggs and think "Why rush it? Maybe we could just live together and have sex until she got sick of me and left in the middle of the night with no explanation"

And by the time I start on the pancakes I'm thinking "Yes, just bury her under the patio and pretend none of this ever happened."

And now, I've just realized I haven't got enough cash to pay for the breakfast.

Awkward.

Just damned awkward.